Religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road?... To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the man with aids say? "I'm dying and there is nothing you can do about it"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the baby cross the road? It's abusive father punted it.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: What did the Jewish man find when he turned on his shower? A: gas

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a dead man in a ditch? Phil.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

a horse nibbled a baby

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

The joke below is absolute shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what did the therapist say to the other therapist? WE'VE SAID THIS WAY TOO MANY TIMES YOU SHIT

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Did you hear about the new German oven? Seats 40.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Do you know what it looks like when you put a cat in the microwave for 3 minutes? I don't know either because I close my eyes when I masturbate.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

You make me believe in myself, after all, it takes one to know one, I just wonder what I am, what are you?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its dopaminergic neurons fired synchronously across the synapses of its caudate nucleus, triggering motor contractions propelling the organism forward, while emitting 'cluck' distress signals, to a goal predetermined by its hippocampal road mappings.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but GET IN THE VAN

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops