Want to hear an urban legend? There's a straight feminist.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

can i have 10 pounds to go to the cinema?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anyone??????????/

thumb_up thumb_down -1

69

thumb_up thumb_down -3

a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a bird and a pool table? Both of them fly, except for the pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Doctor: I bring grave news. Your wife is dying. She won't survive for another 100 years. Concerned and anguished Husband: Oh... that's ok! Doctor: Oh did I say years? I meant days! Oh the mirth! *The doctor breaks down into hysterical laughter, which the Concerned and Anguished Husband is furious to see, as the Doctor is taking delight out of such a grave situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

leon harney ya pikey

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

tom pauling

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber's talent.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue. Wouldn't want to be caught in the crossfire.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did the little boy drop his icecream? he was hit by a train

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

If a vegetarian only eats vegetables, then what does a humanitarian eat?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

My heart is in my hands. Or maybe it's yours. Either way it's mine now. You won't need it anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

your moms my other ride

thumb_up thumb_down -3

My mate mated with my mate's mate. mated of course meaning fucked.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

1.....2.....3.....boom you died

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops