4 people: A pilot, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a little kid, are all on an airplane with only 3 parachutes, when the plane's engine explodes and starts to go down. But the pilot makes an emergency landing at a nearby airport and everybody is okay.

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made this particular man mad which drove him to tell the other man to shut up.

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What's green, and looks like money? Money...

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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A guy walks into a bar... Ouch

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Why can't Hellen Keller read, write, or do anything really? Because, shes a woman.

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Pick up lines: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're wearing a university of Tennessee sweatshirt. If I could rearrange the alphabet to put 'U' and 'I' together, I would not do it because I would have to reorganize all of my alphabetized files. Is it hot in here to you or am I experiencing early signs of a stroke?

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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Two muffins were in an oven. One muffin said "Wow, its hot in here." The other muffin said "Oh my gosh a talking muffin!" The house burnt down because the oven created a fire.

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Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

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your mama is so greasy she should go take a bath

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sometimes i put my hands on the floor tuck my head into my cheat and lean forward... because thats how i roll

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What is the most common cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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Why did the black guy flunk out of school? Because his socio-economic conditions and his lack of support from his parents didn't provide optimal learning conditions.

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an ant walks into my aunt.... the ant took a dump

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My mother forgot to make me a sandwich today.

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Knock Knock Not Yet

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What the difference between a duck? One of the legs is both the same.

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jimmy carr walks into a tax office.

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you first

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Did you hear about that superman guy? He died.

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Why do Chinese people have flat faces? Air bags.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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