A blonde walks into a bar. She just graduated university and thought she would celebrate with a beer.

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All your base are belong to us. Shame on you for making fun of the Japanese. They can't help their broken English sometimes. How would you like it if someone were to nitpick about every single word you typed? Yeah, bet you wouldn't like that, would you? Would it make you feel a bit more guilty to know these people suffered through a horrible earthquake and tsunami - and still managed to survive? Huh? Or that they continue to outshine most other countries in the world in the field of high-technology? Sure, maybe they DID blow up Pearl Harbor in 1941 and send us reeling into another World War. Everyone makes mistakes. Based on the past, "All your base are belong to us" seems pretty trivial now, doesn't it? Go apologize to a Japanese man right now, and never speak of this again.

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Lady wanna go out sometime? Im not lesbian girl! Im not a girl... OUCHIE!

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What did the sushi say to the bee? Nothing, a piece of sushi can't talk and a bee wouldn't listen, stupid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken would greatly appreciate it if you stayed out of its personal life.

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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The Pittsburgh Pirates

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Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

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How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

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What is black, white and red all over? A black man has been shot and a white paramedic is standing over him trying to save his life.

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I pooped.

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whats two naked people in a bed? too much information

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What did little Timmy get his grandmother for Christmas? A coffin

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Why does blond women give great blowjob? Because they has vaacum in thier heads! Blond woman coment; well thats better than having nothing at all in your head! :-)

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How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

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Why did the blonde put tip-ex on the computer screen? To spite her physically abusive husband

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if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

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Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John. John Anderson. Dude we've been friends since first grade! You really don't remember me? I'm going home!

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What can fly for only a short period? A jumper.

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What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

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i like turtals and kids

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Q: What did the guy with glasses say to the guy without glasses? A: Dude your not wearing glasses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops