- Anti Joke

A blond went to a barber to get her hair cut. She had her ear phones in and tolled the barber not to take her ear phones out at all. So the barber was swiching her ear phones to cut her hair then she fell asleep so the barber took both of her ear phones off for a minute and then she died

You're so gay that you lost your virginity to someone of the same gender.

Who is the funniest guy on this planet? Mike the Situation.

There once was a man from nantucket. But he moved to California after he won the State lottery.

what does the nba stand for? Nothing But Africans

How do you fit a whale into a truck bed? You can't, whales live in the ocean.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! Nock. Nock. Whos there? The Chicken?

Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Never mind, that was a stupid question.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

Why was a small girl found dead in the town park? Because Sallie was a bitch and deserved to die.

what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

Why does a black person buy water? Because everyone needs water to survive SKH RZH

Uh no, yogurt as in the bacteria that they add to milk in order to make the finished product yogurt. You see, while the effect is seen in twins (for example if one twin gets raped, the other gets a fucking sore ass) Sorry, I am still under trance here myself, you get out of it, I am gonna have some fun, go splash some water on your face. I mean people go like "woah that is impossible it only happens in rare cases and so on right?" Fun stuff: Yogurt, you can seal yogurt in a steel container miles away after separating its culture (basically having a colony living together and then moving them away from each other as in 30000 kilometers and sealing them in soundproof safe`s and whatnot. Feed one half of the yogurt, and the other one far far away begins munching into thin air, now keep the food close to the yogurt, and the bacteria will begin "begging for it" (as in when baby chicks notice the parent has arrived with food), and so will the culture of yogurt sealed in a safe 30000 miles away. Why? Living in similar states, brings a natural connection, we are attracted to similarities, and as far as the human knowledge of the LAW of attraction goes, distance is not a factor, look it up, or just believe me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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How do you get 1000 pokemon on to a bus? Pikachu!

Person 1: Hey Person 2: What's up? Person 1: Kill Yoself Person 2: Alright

why did the plane crash because it was 9-11

What's the difference between a car and 10 dead babies? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

How many carrots can you fit in a truck Depends who's driving

What goes good with coca cola? Thirst

Why didnt john feel like fis n chips? he had a bus stuck up his ars

What did OJ Simpson say to the blonde? "Don't worry, I'm not going to murder you"