-Knock Knock -Who's there? -John. -Hey John, come on in.

Why did the little boy enter the white van, then leave scarred for life? He was going on a family trip within the said white van, but along the way they got in a horrible accident which involved a bus, a tractor, and finally a steamroller. The boy quickly escaped at the last second only to watch his family scream as the steamroller slowly crushed the van where they were trapped inside. He then broke down into tears and depression and finished it all by jumping off a bridge. It was a truly tragic incident.

How many women does it take to replace a light bulb? Please advise. Thanks, Holly

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then transported by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their eventual mass execution.

Roses are Red Violets are dog I'm Senile Flower tastes like frog.

Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

what do you call gingers ugly.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

When life gives you lemons, thank life for its generosity.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

What can fly for only a short period? A jumper.

A man walks into a bar. He walks out 10 minutes later because he was satisfied with the new hooker he killed and made out with in the bar's bathroom.

Roses are black Violets are white I'm colorblind

Whats worse than losing The Game? The Holocaust

Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

Wanna hear a joke? Twilight

Did you hear the joke about the Israeli guy with the cruise missile down his pants? Me neither. I hope it's a good joke.

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

What's the different between a trampoline and a baby? You take off your shoes before jumping on a trampoline.

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

Whats funny about the Holocaust? Nothing.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Polite say "Hey you, get out of that tree."

whats worse then being lit on fire? dont worry about that right now your ass is on fire!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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