Where does the Queen keep her armies? In various military bases across the country.

Rose are red Violets are blue And I really hate you Friends?????

Moderately entertaining story, friend.

What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

whats better than holocaust...911 cardiac?

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

What do you call a guy with no arms and legs sitting on your street corner? Suicidal.

Why do women wear perfume and makeup? Because they smell bad and are ugly.

Roses are red violets are blue if you were number one I"ll pick number two, if you were number two then I'll pick POO!

Neither have I

What is black, white and red all over? Many things.

BOTTOM!!!

What's sad about 2 black men driving off a cliff? They were my friends.....

the top 6 dictators who have died this year Moammar Gadhafi Kim Jong IL Osama bin ladden Saddam Husein Steve jobs Internet Explorer

Why did the man spill his coffee on his daughter? Because he is dying from Mad Cow disease so his hand experienced a traumatic spasm.

When your scuba diving why do u jump off backwards beacause if u jump forwards than u witll still be in the boat!!!!!!

What happens when a scientist tells you a lie? It's not true.

A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

A white man on his way to happens to sit next to a black man the following conversation involves a democrat and a repuplican arguing about obama's current presidentcy and the wallstreet journal the two do not agree on both sujects and part ways...the white man is later brutally murdered in his own house infront of white and children in an unrelated incident. We should all help to stop violence in our local nieghborhoods.

How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

Roses are red, Violets are blue I suck at poetry, Show me your tits

David Silberberg is gay

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He found out his family was killed in a terrorist attack.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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