A mushroom walked into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom said, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender said, "Exactly. It's a health hazard. I already have two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

What is worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? 1 dead babies in 10 trees.

What would happen if you put a marshmellow in a tractor Because 7, 8, 9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, due to the lack of details, there could be many reasons, such as the possibility that there was a cornfield on the other side, he got scared by a loud noise behind him and ran across the street, or just plain old curiosity, but whatever it may be, right now, we do not know the cause.

My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

What's worse than a bad test score? Getting hit buy a train!!

What do you get when you cross a donkey and a hemophiliac? A bleeding ass!

What did the cat say to the elephant? Meow.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 witnessed while hiding in a closit 7 rape and kill his mother.

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It died. Q: Why did the snake fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird. Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Peer pressure.

what did the man with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a new hat

What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

What's worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Ebola

Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

Why did the girl put on make-up and perfume? Because she was ugly and smelled bad.

What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

What did the person with down syndrome do? He mumbled for a while, chewed on his thumb, fell flat on his face, and died.

What do you call a ostrich with no legs? Damn, that's funny.

bob saget

Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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