why did the man jump off the building? to commit suicide.

What do you get wen u cross a cat and a walrus? Two animals with very different life styles.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the bottom of a pit? Whatever his parents named him.

Yo momma's so fat that all the children within a close proximity of your home think that your mother is a very large woman.

Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

What do you get when you cross a canary and a lawnmower? Nothing. A canary is a small bird, and a lawnmower is an inanimate object. Any procreation of this sort would likely produce no offspring.

Yo mama is an upstanding member of her community.

What's worse than Fantasy Basketball? Playing Fantasy WNBA.

your mama is so stupid stole a free sample

roses are blood violets are veins vampires are crazy and you are insane

brainfart

one day i went to bed

knock knock whos there !!!!!.....WE.....ARE.......SPARTANSSSS.....!!!!!!

no, ten dead babies nailed to ten dead babies.

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of poop. The Mexican is a human the bucket of poop is an object filled bodily wastes.

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

Three blondes walk into a bar. I prematurely ejaculate.

Knock Knock! Who's there? John Simons. This joke lacks a punchline. Yes, yes it does.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

when your cable is on the fritz, you play video games instead. when you play video games, you get good. when you get good, you go to COD XP. when you go to COD XP, you lose to whiteboy 7th st. when you lose to whiteboy 7th st., you get into Skyrim. when you get into skyrim, you reenact cut scenes from skyrim. and when you reenact cut scenes from skyrim... ...you take an arrow to the knee... ...don't take an arrow to the knee. Get rid of cable.

Two black men jump off a cliff, who wins? Wins what?

What's worse than a bee sting? Getting shot in the head

What do you call a black priest? A black priest

1 friend request facebook: ignore. Nuff said

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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