What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

Why did moral man run out of morals? Moral: LEAVE MORAL MAN ALONE! BUAHAHAHA LEAVE HIM ALONE! BUAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

Q: What's worse than a rainy day? A:

Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

Q. have you seen stevie wonders last album? A. neither has he.

whats worse than being cold? having a pine cone shoved up your ass.

yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

So a horse walks into a bar, animal service is called and after being unable to locate the owner he is put down.

A Black Guy, A Mexican, A White guy, an Indian guy, Santa Clause and The Easter Bunny Jump off a 500 foot cliff. Which one dies? The all do. But Santa dies first because of his weight and mass.

Hey Eliz, just a final thought, if and when I die (hey I am your step dad after all, dont forget I am four years older than you now! So ill die first anyway, hopefully) Promise me that you will call me on the phone and either yell SNAKE ANSWER ME SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! Or BOSS ANSWER ME BOOOOOOOOOOSS! Never mind, I never liked videogames ironically, but hey, its funny, Suddenly this Boss guy shows up, and I feel like I have something in common with someone! A game character anyway, and its a fucking boring game too, just sneaking around, then you got to well pay people to build shit and I shut it off by then... ...Finally the nurses are here... Those guys again, hey guys, I cant speak nor remember what button to press to delete shit, but I heard bogosexuals with an h, dont get the message, you see the man with broken fingers there, go get me female nurses or... They sleeping? And not with me? Okay guys, get me out of here, I am humiliating myself in front of my uh... Frienddaughtersisterthing as for the rest of you fucks, has it ever seemed like I have ever cared about your inferior opinions above my superhuma... I am drun or something huh guys? 60 MG valium? You fucking murderers! Well will that other dru.. Fine then... Nero The End? Seriously flaggots! I cant stop typing, just get me out of this... Wheelchair? When did that happen? Well roll me out then! And please you know, fill that code thing and the terms and all that.

If a girl sleeps with 20 guys, she's a slut. If a guy does the same... He's Gay.

What's the difference between a nickel and a dime? Five cents.

How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

What's worse than losing one of your socks? Being jewish during the holocaust

-What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew -The pizza doesn't experience many years of hardship and social belittlement at the hands of a dictator in need of a scapegoat to support radical ideas.

why bouriquet can not read is book ? cause he's retarted

Q: What is your favorite color? M: Blue

Wha'ts the funniest joke in the world? Written.

Why was the black man holding the knife in such a particular manner? Because he was getting dinner ready for his family.

Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

A Jewish man walks into a grocery store. He purchases the items he needs and leaves.

What did Tim say about his wife cheating on him with his best friend's wife? He ran to R Kelly and got peed on.

what's bad about pushing your friend off a cliff? you can't do it twice

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...