A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had come upon them and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Win and Beau have no friends

What do you call a group of black people? A group, you racist.

Your mom is a whore bitchy virgin

Two Guys walk into a bar; the second one should have seen it coming.

A man walks into a bar . . . he is tired and thirsty after a long day at work.

What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

Here's another:

what did the homeless guy get for christmas nothing!

a man reads his wife a poem "roses are red, violets are blue, and I love you." the wife talks to her brother asking why he changed the poem he said men do that cause they love you. later that night she got pregnant.

How do you make a wall a darker shade of red? You throw the baby harder.

Why did the girl fall off her bike? Someone threw a piano at her.

Austin is gay. He goes to River Road. And is a sophomore.

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did the banana go to the hospital? It didnt, bananas cannot speak or walk. It is a simple fact so you should know.

how do you make a dog roll over you kill it

what do you call a monkey? a monkey

Why is your dad gay? Because he takes an enjoyment in a mans dick

Women's rights

A baby walks into a bar, I find that very unlikely as very few baby's can actually walk.

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

What do you call a man with no arms and legs floating in the water? Nothing, because he would drown from his absence of limbs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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