Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

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I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

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Women's Rights.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing. She had no arms Knock knock Whis there Not Mary.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I threatened to throw a fridge at it

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How are people and jelly beans similar? No one likes the black ones

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says why the long face. The horse, unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

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A buissnes man walks into a meeting and says hello i'm a buissnesman

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

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why was little jimmy sad? he had a frog stapled to his mouth why did little jimmy drop his ice cream cone? he got hit by a bus why did little jimmy fall of the swingset? he didnt have any arms what did little jimmy want for Christmas? parents what did he get for Christmas? cancer knock knock whos there? not jimmy

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Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream..... But Leonardo DiCaprio had a dream within a dream within a dream within a dream.

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Is the capitol of Michigan pronounced DEE-troit or de-TROIT? It's pronounced Lansing.

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jack shine and keiran = nate robinson

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Why did the blonde go to business school? She wanted to get into business, and decided that a business degree was a good place to begin.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing!!

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THE GAME

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The Holocaust.

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What time is it? Ask chuck Norris! Gosh!!

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Q.Why was the man so fat A. because he had to much to eat

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What's it called when Justin Bieber has sex? Sex. The specific person partaking in sexual intercourse does not change the term used to describe it.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He got hurt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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