What do retards say when someone knocks on the door... NOBY HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....................and that concludes our moment of silence

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

There are two hippos in a bathtub, one says to the other, "pass the soap." the other hippo says, "no soap, radio."

How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

Why did the black man skip every other step on the stairs? Because he had long legs and it was faster.

A man walks into a bar. After several hours of drinking and loud unintellegable outbursts to those around him, the man wonders off to a nearby bus stop and relieves himself. He is now a registered sex offender.

Who is worse than Justin Bieber? Hitler

How do you keep an idiot busy? Why would you wanna keep an idiot busy, it's not gonna make a difference...

What is the difference between a duck. One of its legs are both the same.

TJE ELIAS, LÄGET?

Why did the kid fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? Because he had no legs. Knock, Knock Who's there? Not that kid.

what's brown and sticky? A stick!

What happens when you throw a green stone into the red sea? It gets wet.

Whats easier to fit in a trunk, babies or concrete bricks? Babies because you can hit them with a pitchfork.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a man? One's tall the other's not

What did one guy say to another? Womens rights..........

Lebron James in the 4th quarter.

Obama

Knock, knock. *answers door*

Why did the man die? He got shot!

I swear to drunk officer I'm not god.

What is sad about a kid dying in a bus accident? The other 20 survived

What's big, red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What's the difference between a whale and an elephant

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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