What's better than eating baby? Nothing.

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Out on the playground of a school, extremely young kids are acting as living witness to an audacious thing. They're watching a very interesting display of strength and brutality. They're observing a enactment of lofty potential and great might. What're they watching? They're regarding their principal getting promptly arrested by the federal police for possession of technically illegal weaponry including, but not only limited to what looked like to them: peculiar "fire crackers" and reloadable "candy dispensers". In the ensuing battle, their principal got shot in the arm and a random pedestrian got killed by a stray bullet. In the end, the cruel joke's on them. Guess what? They're irrepairably damaged for the rest of their life.

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So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

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2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

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what do you do to gay guy who wants to have anal sex with you? beat him with a steel baseball bat in his face.

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Why was Soren gay? Because he likes to eat men's Penises!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody actually knows this because the chicken could not tell us why he/she crossed the road so it would be nearly impossible to get the answer.

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baskets

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

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jamie looks at jacob for arousment. jacob looks at his dog.........

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What do you put on top of salad? Salad Dressing.

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whats green and has wings ? a flying patch of astro turf

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Q: How do you get 1000 babies into a bucket? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He died.

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I swear to god it wasn't me! Dont swear to god its a sin !

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want to hear a bird joke? no well, this is hawkward

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What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

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what rhymes with sloth? -RaPe-

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How do you stop the baby from touching the stove? Cut of its arms.

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Why is lewis rank gay Coz he is

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Knock Knock Whose there? Boo I don't know anyone by the name of Boo. Go away

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops