Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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I saw a mexican drowning and saved him... as my screensaver ;)

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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Roses are red, violets are blue God made me beautiful, how about you?

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Whats worse than 3 black people? 4 Black people

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Q:what do you call a black man in a wheel chair? A: a war veteran who accidentally stepped on a land mine while trying to protect his country.

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Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

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How do you know your sister is on her period? - Your dad´s dick tastes like blood.

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Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

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Kah-________-

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This is not mean't to be a joke, but I have noticed the least popular thing on here is the Jew and the Pizza joke. I am Jewish and find this extremely offensive. I applaud all of those who gave it a negative vote and realize the Holocaust is not a laughing matter.

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Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four, maybe 3, depending on the size of each person.

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What did the apple tree say to the farmer? "Stop picking on me"

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Roar, roar! I am the king of the jungle! But did you know the lion would be defeated by a polar bear in a battle between the two?

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What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

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Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

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69

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What did he African say when he had diarrhea? Shit

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Why did the audience laugh at Chaz Bono? Because he told a funny joke.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Nothing really

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Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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