A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What do u call two mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan!

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Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

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How did the blind man eat his soup? With a spoon. Despite no vision, the man could feel the shape of what he was touching.

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock off a building

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Whats worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

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how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

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why are black people so good at basketball? Because all they have to do is shoot, steal, and run.fctswity (sultably

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What do you call a black man sitting on your couch? A house guest.

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

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Tic tac toe. You were adopted.

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What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train?!? The teacher is a highly-intelligent organism and the train is a large vehicle used in transporting goods over long distances on the ground.

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What has sand and an ocean? A picture of a beach.

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Q: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Knock Knock And then I looked through the peephole and I saw it was the handyman that was going to fix my leaky sink so I opened the door

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Why was the Asian women crossing 8 lanes of traffic with no blinker? Poor chink had a seizure.

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Their, they're, there You're, your

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What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

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Yo mama is so hot that she needed to lower the temperature

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms. A: Knock knock! B: Who's there? A: Not Sally.

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Roses are red Violets are fin I'll be the 6 You be the 9

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what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? I don't know, I don't have a watch anymore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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