Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Nock Nock. Whose there? The chicken.

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Why can't Sally ride a bike? Because Sally's a fish.

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Why did the 5 year-old go to the hospital? He had cancer

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Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

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What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you....you pull the pin and trow it back

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When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

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doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

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Why did the tree stay home from school? Because, trees don't have school.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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roses are gray violets are gray everything's gray I'm a #$%ing dog

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Why do black people like Basketball so much? Because it is a sport participated world wide. They just happen to like it too.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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A black man went on the bus and sat down next to a white man. The white man looked up from his magazine and stared at the black man. They then chit-chatted and enjoyed their trip.

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The cow went moo

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A black man walks in to a bar, and is promptly escorted from the premises, for being under the age of 21

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what did one mental hospital worker say to the other? Billy your not a mental hospital worker, give heather back her clothes so I can escort you back to your cell.

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you know whats weird about italians? their italian

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your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

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Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

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Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

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What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

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Why did Kelly never see Wass? cus she never looked in right places !!!

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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