100% of smokers die 100% of people die I am tied to a tree

Ill wait for you as long as you need Nero, I am just so glad you are alive and well... I know you, you would not be this chatty unless you where doing far worse, I know you will recover, dont think about the time for my sake, ill refresh this page every five minutes or so.

Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

What do you call an indian who is underwater? A scuba diver.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stappled to the chicken.

Whats a box full of sand? a sandsquare

Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

Roses are red violets are blue we're stuck together like superglue roses go brown violets go darker cut the crap and the stupid laughter...I just went through a breakup

ok so there was a black guy a white guy and an asian in a bar.so the asian guy says lets leave and they all exited the bar.

hey guys check out my cool youtube video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivQ_bezJjK0

A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed here!" A 14 year old walks out of a bar.

Why did the parrot fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

why does'nt mexico have an olympic team? because they have a poor economy and have other things to worry about.

Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

friends are like potatoes you eat them they die

what's more funny then being raped? not being a minority!

Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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