what did Russell wilson get for Christmas a seahawk..

thumb_up thumb_down -36

what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

thumb_up thumb_down -36

what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops