Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

What did John name his dog? Doggy

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

See you later... Just joke I'm blind

Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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