Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

69.

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

Why can't Molly ride her bike? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Molly.

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what do you call a Mexican driving a plane? a pilot you were probably to racist to work that out

Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...