what did the whale say when he came out of the water? BLAHHRRAHAHHAAARRRAER

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What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

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What is big, hard, and bushy? My Penis. I lied about it being bushy.

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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What did Rihanna remember when she corrected Chris Browns tweets she can't remember last thing she saw was a fist

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What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

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Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

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What would you do if your penis disintegrated? Never mate again.

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What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Who had an average-sized penis he only used during monogamous sex with his spouse.

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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What's worse than finding a baby in a dumpster? Being late on your taxes

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What's green and if you eat it you die? A Biljarts table.

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Why dont blind people go skydiving? Because they dont live when they hit the ground

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Why do dogs bark? Idk why? Cause there dogs

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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What do you call 10 old black people in a barn? Used farm equipment

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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