Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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