What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

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What is red and hangs around the back of a train? A miscarriage.

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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Your mums a potato

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

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Where do dinosaurs go on vacation? Dinosaurs are mainly extinct except for a select few such as crocodiles, which are arguably ancestors of dinosaurs. With this in mind, dinosaurs do not go on vacation because they are dead.

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball? A blonde is a human woman and a bowling ball is an inanimate object used for the popular sport of bowling.

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Jerry Sandusky walks up to the reception desk at a day care center. What does the lady at the desk say? Nothing, she promptly gives Mr. Sandusky his son and they leave.

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Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

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What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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Feminism

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Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

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What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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