Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

So a baby seal walks into a club.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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