Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

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what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

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Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

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what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

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I? Everett

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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a person who will soon die of beeties

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

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What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

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What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

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The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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A gay man watches football.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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