How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Faithful men.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

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Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys something.

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You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops