Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

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So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

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What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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why was the boy sad He was just abused by his parents and had aids

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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