Why wouldn't Helen Keller be able to drive if she was alive today? She would be inside her coffin not knowing how to get out

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

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why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

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What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

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I dont often wash my hands in the bathroom but when i do its so people dont think im gross.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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You are as dumb as a dumb looking person.

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What's funny about four black guys driving off a cliff in a Cadillac? They were my friends...

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What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

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Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

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Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS darragh hamilton

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Ferrari? That was my Ferrari by darragh hamilton

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

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knock knock, whos there? the bum bum boys ready to dance :) ``~ ``sms

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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