What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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a

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Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

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Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

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what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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