What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

whats white and sticky? a white stick

Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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