Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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Q: What's big, yellow and can't swim? A: A school bus full of children.

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat salad instead of sandwiches because she wants to lose weight by going on a no-carb diet.

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

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9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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