What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

Q:How can you tell an asian has just robbed your home? A: You took the necessary precautions to purchase a very high quality security system and you caught the whole thing on tape, and the man was arrested.

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

A blond, brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who tells them each one can have one wish. They all wish for the same thing, to be back home with their families.

Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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