Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

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wut did the cow say to the other cow thet's get a moo shake

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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How did the dinosaur come out of the water? Wet.

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What do you do with a baby with a broken jaw? Deepthroat.

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What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

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Two cows are sitting in a bathtub. One cow says please pass the soap. The other cow says nothing, cause it's a cow, making it incapable if speech. The other cow was just a guy in a cow costume.

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whats funnier than 24? your grammar, its more funny thank you.

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a black man walked into a black bar. what color was the bar afterwards? the same color. its a drinking spot not a pole

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

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Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

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mohammed ali walks into a bar, gets a drink, signs a few autographs , and a good time is enjoyed by all.

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how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

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Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

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What do you do when you're given a phonebook? You ask for their name.

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How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

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Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

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Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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