What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

A muslim paints Mohammed

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

hi

"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is actually a really good question which leads me to wonder why the farmer let the chicken out in the first place.

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

If you are what you eat, then imagine a prostitute.

Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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