I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

How did the three girls get free drinks? Two of them were attractive and out of obligation to "the game" the third girl was also purchased a beverage.

Yo momma so poor, she can't afford to live in a two story Cheerio box

What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

PENIS

What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

why does my face bleeding theres an axe in it

what did the obese kid get for chistmas? an athsma attack ,which led to death.

How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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