A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +15

your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's big fat and hairy? Peter

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

thumb_up thumb_down +13

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

thumb_up thumb_down +11

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

pull my finger (farts)

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops