I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

The Grinch stole Christmas, he accidentally dropped it and Christmas was ruined for everyone life sucked -shane,Adam,David and Riley go cry about it

What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

How do you get a black guy to learn how to read? Find a stolen book and tell them that it's the recipe for the spices in fried chicken.

A handicapped man walks into a bar...

Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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