My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

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Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

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Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

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The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

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25

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A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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