I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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9/11 my birthday

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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42

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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Why did Schrödinger's Cat cross the road? It didn't

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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