Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

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What did the American man say to his brother right before his brother's wedding? You should not get married because most likely your marriage will end in a horrible divorice, which will ruin the rest of your pathetic life.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because its rayseans favorite number

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Little johnny raised his hand one day in class and asked if he could use the restroom. The teacher said he had to say the abc's first. Johnny successfully recited the abc's and then proceeded to use the restroom.

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some exercise. They were getting terribly overweight.

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What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

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Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

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Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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how to name your chinese kid. throw a spoon dow the stairs

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A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

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why was the 6 year old boy crying? his mother had just passed away from terminal cancer and his stepdad caught him crying so he kicke hm in the face and told him to man up.

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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9/11 my birthday

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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