- Anti Joke

A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

What did the man say to the other man. Hi

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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i punched my mother in the face once she cried

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

bite me

pobody's nerfect

Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch