Kid 1: Mama why is my name Daisy? Mama: Because when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head! Kid 2: Mama why is my name Rose? Mama: Becuase it was a nice name.

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A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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What do you tell a woman who claims that she is going to yell "fire" in a crowded movie theater? That doing so could result in serious injuries or even death, and that she would be wise to reconsider her future options, as she could be held responsible for any and all problems that arise.

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

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Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

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What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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i am a dino. RAWR.

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

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Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

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Micheal Curran...that is all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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