How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

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Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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How did the fat guy survive the plane crash? Because he still in the food court at the airport.

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Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

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What's worst than your favorite football team losing the football? Giving birth to a stillborn child.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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Don't you just hate it when somebody is saying something interesting and they don't finish their sentence?

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Where did Jonathon go after he died? - Burger King, he died from diabetes

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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Q: What's worse? Inhaling fly spray or deodorant? A: The Holocaust

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

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Why do dogs bark? Idk why? Cause there dogs

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what do you call a black drug dealer? A pharmacist.

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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Where does Charlie Sheen Shop? Winners

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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Your mom's house is so old, that she has rats and other various critters such as spiders, gnats, and mosquitoes.

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What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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