Read a Book.

Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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