what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

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A guy at a baseball game....

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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Whats worse than spilling the milk? Getting raped by the easter bunny.

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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Why do so many people enjoy these jokes. They are funny

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

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Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

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what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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