Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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TRICERATOPS!

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A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

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When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

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What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops