What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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What did the dealer say to the addict? Sup.

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Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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An orphan falls off a cliff.

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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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