How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

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A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

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At least now we know, that most people are not like that, and with that sentence, my desire to see humanity as a whole happy, is dead. Thank you, you have made me realize that for each and every thing positive I have found within myself, I believed that I was simply learning more about how to be an average human being. I admire you, yet as painful it feels not to deny the truth, much of what I admire within you, reminds me of my self. Share that money with me, but as a gift, not as a contract, as a friend, not as someone buying me out, because my values might not be much, but for now, its what remains of the world I sought to create. Let us speak some other time, It was nice meeting you again Red, you always dig your way into my core, where I discover that I am stuck in life because I still sad deep inside, and then you take some of that sadness away.

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Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

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Incidentally,on the subject of friends, when do you actually classify someone as a friend? Is it: When you have been to each others' house; When you have had an intelligent conversation more than once; When you have stayed for dinner; Or perhaps simply when each has decided that the other is worth the air that they breathe? [L]

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A russian, a jew, and a black guy are walking down the street. The midget trips and knocks into the jew who in turn knocks into the black guy. It turns out that they all know each other from high school. They ended up going out for lunch and drinks and it actually turned into a great day.

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Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

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A man walks into a bar. The force of the impact causes serious head trauma and kills him within a matter of minutes.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

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What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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What does the composer Berg lack? Schoen.

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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XD Jackass.

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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