Why did the boy climb the tree? To get to the top. - Driiiftz

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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Whats more worse than a dead baby? You shouldn't be thinking about dead babies or stuff worse than them, it is sad.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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A man walks in a bar he talks to the bartender aand he tells him a joke about him and hs friends. how do you find out his name? You killl the bartenders friends and family untill he talks.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

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What is the difference between your mom and a vacuum? The vacuum does not use your mom to clean the floor since it is an inanimate object and can not control people.

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Ask me if i'm a fish. Are you a fish? Do I look like a fish?

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Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

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What do you get when you eat all potatoes Their all gone

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A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

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A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

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What's a foot long and slippery? A slipper.

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Why did Larry fall off his bike? He was hit in the head with a brick...

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If I had a penny for every time I said the word "the" I would have AIDS

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Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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A Jew, a black man and a Christian enter a bar. Black people werent allowed in at the time so he was escorted out. The Jew And Christian have a blast and the time of their lives that night.

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A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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