A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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What are you getting for Christmas? Wasted.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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Why can't the T-Rex give high fives? Because they are extinct.

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How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

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Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

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What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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Knock knock Whos there Who Who who Don't stutter it was just a joke

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Tony Romo

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Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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Jimmy Saville

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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