-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did one computer say to the other? 01001111 01100010 01110110 01101001 01101111 01110101 01110011 0100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001 0100000 01101001 01110011 0100000 01101111 01100010 01110110 01101001 01101111 01110101 01110011

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday, Popeyes has a special sale buy one get one free fried chicken. The chicken was like "Oh hell no, today's Tuesday? I'm funna get my feathery-asss out of here.." However, chickens do not know what day it is, nor do they care about being captured by humans. I also made up the part when the chicken began talking.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Getting voted down to page 4067

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did the chicken cross the street? so it could throw a fridge at you, you are very loud at night for some reason and you wake everyone up. the chicken then goes home to watch gay porn videos.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What has 8 legs and makes women scream? .....Gang rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many trees does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trees are incapable of screwing light bulbs

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is the difference between a pile of baby's and a new jeep? I don't have a brand new jeep in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why didnt jane scream when she got robbed? Because she got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

so i was on anti joke and i read a joke, it made me laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? Just in case he gets a hole in one! -LEts Go Mets P.S the comment below is also very stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

your mom is so fat that she should probably try a deit in the neer future.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops