What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

thumb_up thumb_down -4

a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

My favorite part of the movie Frozen is when the parents die.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

antonis sister is mighty fine

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Dear Rubix Cube, DONE!! Sincerely, Colorblind

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

i wonder who made this website? a human

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

when life gives you lemons throw them away.. they are probably bad

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Do you know what's the sexiest thing in the world? Sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops