Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

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How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

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Quinn Grifith Randel lives in Roswell, GA

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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Rawan what are you looking at, stop reading this

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

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I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

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Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

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What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

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steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

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Your mom is so ugly that you should buy her a paper bag to cover her face because she is just so very unattractive that it burns mine and everyone else's eyes.

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what did the black women name her child jamaal

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Robert: wanna hear a joke? Robort:ok, shoot. Robert: *BANG!*

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Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

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i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

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What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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