Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

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What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

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What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

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Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

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What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? Being raped... What's worse than being raped? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two flies in your soup

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This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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