What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

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Women.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the paralympics? Walking.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

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******************************************************** Okay, so there were two muffins in the oven. One muffin said, "Oh my gosh! We're gonna die!" The other muffin said, "Whoa a talking muffin!" **********************************************************

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

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i've got a little something for you. in fact it's so small you can't see it. it's called spermatazoa

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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69...you know how awkward this is now...

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

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Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops