what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

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What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

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rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

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i Have read and agreed to the terms of service

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How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

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meatspin.fr

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johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

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Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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