knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

hi

what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

What's brown an sticky Shit

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

so your snowboarding in the dessert and all four of your tires pop. how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house. the answer is B. 500 squids

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

A grasshopper walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you", the grasshopper replies, "you have a drink named Bob"

What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...