Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Someone threw a hippo at the pilot.

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

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What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

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What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

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whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

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Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

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what did the pornography filmer say to the asain man as he was having sex? im taking a highly pixelated recording of you and your partner engaging in sexual intercourse

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Half life 3 confirmed

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

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A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

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Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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