Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

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CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

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Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How did the little boy die? A speeding moving truck took a sharp turn, the locks on the doors broke open and a huge office desk flew out and crushed the boy.

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Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

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what did the chinese man say to the convicts at the side of the road? so long gay boys what did the convicts do to the chinese man? nothing he was in a car

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What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a Jew? One comes back from camp.

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What was Helen Keller's favourite colour? None, due her disability she was unable to see colours...

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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There is a horse sitting at a bar, and the bartender says MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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