What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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A leper sees that a woman has dropped a bag of groceries on the sidewalk. "Hey ma'am, can I give you a HAND?" asks the leper. "No thank you, sir. I can manage." replies the woman. "That's a relief," laughs the leper, shyly. "I am quite weak due to leprocy."

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

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Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

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Whats Pink and fluffy? Yellow fluff thats been dyed pink :D

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Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

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Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

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If you go to a restaurant and you have more food on your plate then someone who is obese, you KNOW you have too much food.

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Periods are red, waffles are blue, some poems rhym, this one doesn't.

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Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange.

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Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

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Sigh, at times like this I begin to ponder what I am doing with my life. I do not look that much like some anime character thingie, she is awfully cute for a anime character though.

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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