Roses are red Violets are blue Columbine was funny

Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

well use a tissue!

no rasist joks

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

1 woman and 2 guys were on a roadtrip. Every single day they would go do the same things. First go to Denny's, then to the mall, then see a horror movie. One day the woman said, "I don't want to go see the horror movie, I'm scared enough!" So the guys agreed that they'd trick the woman into going to a horror movie before Denny's. They went, and the woman was scared out of her mind. She yelled at them both for 30 minutes and to this day never speaks to them.

once upon a time a guy thought he wrote an original anti joke but it wasnt

What do you call a orphan with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Scrood

haha

Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

What do we call Osama? Osama

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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