Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

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What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

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Potassium? K.

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

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Justin beiber comment if u get it

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Why did the old man die? He was old.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

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A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and gives a heavy sigh. The bartender asks, "What's wrong?" The guy says, "Nothing."

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Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops