How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

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A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

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What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a psychopath

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

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hello i hav a growing interes in math and arithmetic especially when it involves pi if u are still reading this you either didnt realize that this was a joke or just didnt care but most likely it means that the first line interested or bored u and u wanted to find out wut the rest was u like????

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

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whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

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How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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Q:What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

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What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

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What has four legs one head but only one foot? A dog that was born with physical deformities.

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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