Why are you on this sight? You're procrastinating. I am too

Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

[Insert anti-joke here]

why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

Why did Wiggy fall into the toilet? Wiggy was the name of his turd.

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

whats funnier then a children's hospital..... it catching on fire.

What do you do when a blonde takes the pin out of a grenade and throws it at you? Take cover as there is a person close to you wielding an active grenade.

What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

Everyone is equal. It doesn't matter if you're black, red, yellow, brown, or normal.

Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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