are you from hawaii? because your the only ten I see

If 2 trains are going 60 mph, their going in opposite directions towards each other, they are slowing down 1 mile per hour per 10 miles and they are 100 miles away, would you rather have Coke or Pepsi?

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

Why did the moose cross the road? Migration.

Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

the sky is green no it is not

Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

New Name for Jersey Shore: American Whorer Story

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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