How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

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Why was the prostitute unsuccessful? because she had no vagina

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

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a white van was driving really slow and he stopped in front 3 children. "do you want some candy" the old man said. the kids took the candy and the old man drove away happily, knowing he made someones day.

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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what this: b a dead one of these: p

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Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

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Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

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Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops