What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

You tell me. I have amnesia.

Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

What is the last thing to go through a flies head before it hits a windshield. Nothing because flies aren't capable if rational thought.

I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

Why was the black man out of a job? because he was recently laid off and had not found any job offerings that he would be interested in

What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

what do you call a gay guy? kevin

roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

your mama so old, shes dead.

Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

Whats fat and gay joe diragi

woman's rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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